On listening to '7 Things' for Nick Jonas's birthday

And its unexpectedly poignant pull

The entirety of my adolescence can be summed up with a glance at my long-since defunct Nick Jonas stan/fanfic Myspace page.

But a ~*~ 32 year old lady ~*~ must, at some point, part ways with childhood crushes. This is not to say, “goodbye” forever, mind you — it’s merely about letting some things go in order to make room for all things new. For the plot and character development and personal evolution, if you will.

I whine about being bad at math (which is not not true) but I love memorizing random dates and codes.

Give me a combination of numbers that signal an important location, a significant moment, or historical event and I will find a way to carve it directly onto my brain so as to never, ever, forget it. For that reason — and that reason alone — I will always remember the fact that Nick Jonas was born on September 16, 1992.

I know this the same way I know Aaron Samuels asked what day it was on October 3rd, that April 25th is the perfect date, and little Nemo can be seen hanging out with P. Sherman at 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney.

On this Tuesday 9-16-25, a typical busy work day, I found myself overwhelmingly thinking about things other than Nick Jonas … This feels like something I shouldn’t have to make clear but as I am writing a whole essay about my teen celeb crush, I figured better safe than sorry.

But during my post-dinner scroll I came across a cover of Demi Lovato’s Don’t Forget, which prompted me to queue up a Spotify radio and oops! We’re listening to 16-y/o NJ cry SOS ‘cause his girlfriend brought her annoying friends to dinner! He said, “you and me and no one else,” STACY! (Idk what her name is).

It was a fitting tribute, I thought, after a day of largely ignoring an event that would have prompted a celebration akin to a personal bank holiday 15 or so years ago.

SOS is a friggin’ great song which always gets me thinking of its iconic music video, which then reminds me of the time Joe literally fell on broken glass at the American Music Awards … say what you want about the JoBros but one thing’s for sure: They’re dedicated to their craft and the show will go on!

A few songs later I heard the opening chords of Miley’s tween breakup anthem and stilled. When 7 Things was first released it broke. my. internet. (and brain).

Specifically because of this photograph, which, due to my aforementioned Myspace presence, I knew was of Miley & Nick despite the doodles over his face. We were sleuths, I tell you!

Miley co-wrote 7 Things and released it as the lead single of her second studio album, Breakout, in June 2008. It was the first song she put out with no ties to her Disney Channel character, Hannah Montana.

I remember the moment I first heard those “shas” and wondered how, a random sound I’d never been exposed to, could make so much sense and mean so much. Not a single dude I cared about had texted me in any significant way at that point in life but boy did I wish he had just so I could "delete it.”

7 Things was Miley’s song about these more grown up, angry feelings towards her dumb ex. She was turning the page on a new chapter as a performer and songwriter while providing tween girlies of the aughts with some sick bars to scream-sing at future sleepovers. <3and we’ll be forever grateful 2 u 4 that, diva<3

I’ve dubbed 32 my “Lorelai Gilmore” year (more on that later) and fittingly there have been a lot of “grown-up,” “coming-of-age” things happening. I’m prioritizing health and exercise, I’m in the middle of wedding planning, and I have a full time, very demanding job. I may not have a teenage daughter but ya girl is definitely booked and busy!

As I was listening to Miley sing about all the things she hated (but really loved) about Nick, I thought about all the “Jonas Brothers things” I’ve missed this year. I think JonasCon was on my actual birthday? And they’re celebrating the band’s 20th anniversary with a tour so big Demi Lovato made a surprise appearance at MetLife for their opening performance (huge!).

And I was … somewhere else … genuinely not even giving it a second thought. There was no familiar pang or pull of FOMO, no alarm set for pre-sales, no calendar reminders about tour dates, no must-have limited edition merch.

I don’t feel badly, now a grown woman with a fulfilling life and career, for missing those events but I do feel wistful for 15, 16, 17-year-old Erika, who would have cut off multiple limbs and/or made any number of terrible deals with all kinds of storybook villains to be there.

I wonder what she would have to say if someone told her there were now people in her life whose birthdays are much more deeply etched along the grooves of her brain and in the folds of her heart. People who make every day brighter and mundane experiences richer.

I wonder if she would be stubborn and maintain that she and those three guitar-wielding boys from Wyckoff, New Jersey (and their baby brother Frankie) were meant to collaborate both personally and musically … Because as far as she was concerned it was written in the stars.

I think though, secretly, she would have been thrilled to hear she found people to love for real.

Because for all she dreamt of hopping aboard a tour bus with a merry band of brothers to go off on an adventure, what she really wanted was to grow up and find herself, her confidence, her voice, and never look back.

Which, reader, I did.

Still no matter how old I get I vow to take time (maybe every September 16th?) to revisit some of those “first loves.”

It is impossible and a little unfair to be expected to completely let go of the magnificent dreams that become our greatest motivators. Sometimes (measured, deliberate, within reason) delulu is the solulu. And we should try to hang onto that energy as best we can.

To summarize, I will leave you with the following quote from prolific millennial poet Destiny Hope (Miley) Cyrus:

“And the seventh thing I like the most that you do
Is you make me love you.”